Kaz Augustus: A Study in the Art of Self-Control.

As far as competitors go, there are several varieties. The flashy, in-your-face types. The steady warriors, who don't say much as they swiftly pass by you on race day. And then there are the Kaz Augustus's of the world. Similar to the terrifying "East Wind" of Biblical fame, this kind of tri-athlete appears with no warning, decimating all in his path. In an effort to save the egos, the athletic equipment, and possibly the small children of any and all competitors, the FV3 Triathlon Historical Committee has published the following Player Profile on Kazuto Higo Augustus...

Kazuto Higo Augustus, came into this world innocently enough on March 28th, 1971...and then promptly kicked it in the face. A "difficult" child, as described by the Nuns at Sacred Heart Montessori, Kaz seemed intent on leaving his mark on all who dared to cross him. Greta Powalski, a 99 year-old-nun recalls her experience with the extraordinary boy, "We took him in thinking we could do him some good. I mean, he'd already been kicked out of three or four Military Schools, what did we have to lose? That kid just never backed down from a fight, and with a name like 'Kaz' he had his share of playground bullies. I've lived on three different continents, seen drought, plague, and famine...but I've never to this day seen anything like that boy."

With the onset of puberty, Kaz experienced a fresh surge of aggression and was kicked out of Sacred Heart to fend for himself on the long, lonely streets of Nevada. At the tender age of thirteen Kaz discovered that he could profit by his special brand of brutality, when he met Steamy McGee, a promoter in the underground world of Street Fighting. Kaz quickly became known for his lightning reflexes, his ability to fight twenty to thirty opponents at one time, and his dazzling smile. As the money rolled in and his fame grew, he began to give in to the recklessness of youth. He took up dangerous hobbies like sky-diving, bear wrestling, and wearing flashy shirts in the daytime. Before he knew it, his life was spinning out of control.

His trips to the emergency room became more and more frequent. Not for any injuries he had sustained, but to visit fallen opponents and deliver messages like, "When I say 'Stay Down', I mean it." On one such visit, he met a woman whom he later would describe as his "Angel of Mercy". This "Angel", known simply as "Shelly", was reading storybooks to the patients of the Pediatric Ward when Kaz happened by. He was struck by her beauty, as well as her gentle manner. He quickly introduced himself and asked her out, but the beginning of this life-changing relationship was not all bliss.

Shelly summarizes that time period with the following thoughts, "He seemed to have a sweetness about him, just buried very, very, very deep. I liked him a lot, but there were so many disturbing incidents. Like the time we were told that our table had been given away at a very popular restaurant. I just didn't think crushing that man's Adam's apple was helpful, or appropriate."

With Shelly's encouragement, Kaz came to realize that he had a problem. He moved to Northern California to escape his street fighting ties, enrolled himself in therapy, and was asked to try channeling his "emotions" into non-contact sports. Kaz took up Beach Volleyball and found great success on the semi-pro circuit. Most of this success was due to the fact that Kaz could repeatedly spike the ball directly at the opposing team, until they were too bruised, or demoralized to continue. Shelly realized that things were not going well. She dropped him, and he dropped therapy.

These were dark days for Kazuto Augustus. Heartbroken, he didn't leave his apartment for months. Barely sleeping, he survived off of bad take-out, and re-runs of "Who's the Boss?". One afternoon he discovered an injured kitten on his doorstep. "Snowball", as he would later come to call the cat, opened up a tunnel of light for the broken ex-streetfighter, ex-Semi-Pro Beach Volleyball Player, ex-boyfriend of Shelly. As Kaz nursed the kitten back to full strength he realized that it was extremely satisfying to help, rather than destroy. He emerged from his apartment three weeks later as a changed man. He was now a healer. He immediately enrolled himself in Medical School. When asked how it was possible for Kaz to attend their school without any formal education past the age of thirteen, the Dean of said college replied with a stricken look, "Well...he asked...and we said okay. He was extremely persuasive."

Renewed in spirit, Kaz quickly re-connected with Shelly and eventually persuaded her to be his wife. He also determined that Podiatry would be his field of specialty. When asked why, he responded "Maybe to atone for all of the feet I've broken over the years. But maybe also as a constant reminder to myself that feet should be used primarily for walking, running, and jumping. Not for delivering debilitating blows to the head, chest, or groin."

Kaz Augustus is now a happy, mild-mannered husband, father, and Podiatrist. One would never suspect the dark path that has led him here. He admits that he still does battle with his inner demons from time to time, but participating in activities like the FV3 Annual Triathlon have helped him channel his aggression in appropriate ways. He notes, with a smile, "I mean, it's not like you can throw your bike at the other guys, you know? Or at least I've never tried that." To Kaz Augustus, and all who will share the competitive field with him on T-day, our prayers are with you.